Week 8, day 2 - Mind set

I think I have now reached a milestone. Up until this point, this challenge was such an effort for me, even if it was me who came up with the idea in the beginning. Normally we get up in the morning and say: God, I need to lose some weight, let's start some exercising... Then the whole thing dies in a couple of days or weeks. I'm now happy that I started publishing this on facebook, because I would have given up a long time ago. But I don't want to look like a weak person.

Yesterday morning was another weighing - I'm now looking forward to these. I weigh 87,6 kg, 193 pounds, which means I get a 'met' this week too! But the real difference I see is in my eating. My mind is now set on the weight-loss. I don't feel physical pain when I don't eat a yoghurt or a piece of chocolate just because I want to eat 'something'. I just get a large glass of water, or some fruit juice, or even nothing at all, because I realise that I'm not actually hungry, just need to taste something. What's even better is that fruit season is starting in our garden. The cherry tree is so full of cherries, its branches are hanging down. There are not many better things than walk out to the garden and fill my belly with delicious fruit, straight from the tree (no, I don't wash it first).
The weather is so hot these days (about 25-30 degrees) that it's better staying indoors. This also means that I rather do the exercises in the gym than go for a long walk or even do some jogging. I'm about halfway down the road, this is week 8. I know the exercises by heart, don't need to look at the sheet Tom sent me in the beginning. I do the stretches straight after I'm finished with a particular exercise, and take the time again at the end to make sure all my muscles are relaxed. This might be the reason why I'm not having any pains here and there, I feel much more energetic, and what's even more important for me, this challenge is not an effort any more, rather a goal that I can't wait to reach. I'm sure I will continue the exercises after the 16 weeks is up. At the end, this is the real benefit, isn't it? Change my way of life.

There is another aspect to this, that I haven't wrote about until now. After giving birth for the first time, my linea alba has actually disappeared, making my abdominal muscles (rectus abdominis) separating. In real life it means that the left and right sides of these muscles are quite far apart from each other (I can stick four fingers inbetween). This makes my belly look like I'm still about five months pregnant, because all my intestines and organs are not held back by these muscles. Obviously this hasn't got any better after giving birth for the second time. The linea alba cannot grow back, the only option for me is probably a surgery if I don't want to hear any more comments about expecting again (I don't).



I went to see a plastic surgeon to hear my options. I can't say he was very understanding and supportive. I got the cold facts. He told me to come back in 6 months, lose as much weight as I want (get in a 'normal' shape that I would normally exist in) and exercise these muscles. The surgery can be paid either by my medical cover or I pay it myself. It would cost around 300.000 HUF (about a grand in pounds). It will be up to this surgeon to decide who's paying. And although he didn't say it, I have a funny feeling that if I go back with all the extra weight lost and my body toned, he will do it for free (medical cover), but if I go back pretty much like I look now, he will be thinking she doesn't want it that much after all, if she wasn't able to loose the extra pounds... And he would be right I guess. So by September I should be back in a good shape. My goal is 75 kgs, 165 pounds. I know this is really far down the road, first I'm concentrating on reaching my first goal - 16 weeks, 16 pounds.